Last night, Lash and I drove to Georgetown to meet his parents, his two grandmothers, and my grandmother for dinner in honor of his 24th. (Birthday month, huh?!) Our grandmothers had never met before, so it made the evening very special for us all to be together.
After dinner, when Lash and I went to drop my grandmother off before we headed back down 17. As we left her house, she gave me a picture book that she started compiling many years ago. It was filled from cover to cover with pictures and various programs and memoirs of my sister and me growing up, from birth until about age eleven.
While Lash was listening to the Saints/ Vikings game on the radio, I was taken to another world looking at these pictures. Memories flooded through my mind as I was suddenly reminded of all times we all had together growing up. The vacations with friends and families, the birthdays, the first piano recital, Easters, Christmases, summers on the water, etc.
At some, I died laughing at my goofy sister and I in matching princess or cheerleader costumes, others I would groan as Mama (my grandmother) had managed to capture me at my most awkward growing age.
And then, as I reached the last few pages of the book, I burst into tears.
Good tears, yes, but sad tears, too. (Now, some may say that I am an emotional person- I certainly do wear my emotions on my sleeve- but I like to think of it as being more sensitive and sentimental—but that is neither here nor there :))
I think that I realized as I turned each page was how much I miss those people that shaped my life in those early years. . . whether they have been lost to death or to distance or to different circumstances.
As I looked at each page and each picture, I began to yearn for those lost relationships. I am specifically talking about my mom’s step-father, my dad’s mother, and our caretaker that RoRo that raised my mom and loved my sister and I like her own children. I certainly I have very fond memories with these folks from my childhood, but how I wish I could go back and have just a day with them! What I would give to have them in my life today, to help me, to guide me, and to love me with that unconditional love they showed me every day that they were on this earth.
With that being said, (beware, this post is taking a stark turn), I have modified my new years resolutions. Instead of trying to “work out” and "budget" and “read” and do all of these things that I’m sure are on everyone’s resolutions, I have decided that I am going to enjoy each day with the people I am with. I am going to spend more time with the people that are important to me, the people who have helped make me the grown woman I am, and those who encourage me to walk in the ways of the Lord.
After all, we all know we need to exercise more, eat less, turn off the trashy TV and stretch our mind with a book, go to church more. . . but what about the time we set aside to spend with those that matter most? What we are doing for others?
I think we (I, specifically) need to focus on things that are more important in life. . . not those that are tangible… but the relationships, the families, the friends, the memories that we make every single day . . . that will be with us for the rest of our lives.
So I’m thankful for the picturebook and the tears. Because as I turned each page, it made me realize, how quickly time flies by. After all, things will come and go in our life. But what is going to be that we remember? What is it going to be that is filling our life’s picture books or even our children’s picture books? What kind of legacy are we leaving?